Being home is great, I feel chillaxed. I get to spend time with my dog Molly and see all my friends again. The only pressure is food. My mom makes dinner and expects everyone to eat it, and it tastes awful so it's not even worth eating, but I try to make my family happy. I also haven't been able to keep up with calories counting because my food diary is back at my flat, so I have been guessing stuff and trying to keep a note in my head. It's very frustrating. Also as I have been eating full meals I have been having frequent, 'baths' hence the quote marks, meaning spending most of the time hanging over the toilet and having quick baths. I hate purging, but it's my only option. I feel bulimia taking a strong point this week. Today we had chinese food and I ate sweet and sour chicken, it was soo nice but it makes me feel like a fat shit after it and my stomach is sore when I have normal food amounts that I used to eat....I guess it's shrank. I hate having food in my stomach unless it's very little, it feel's very bad and heavy. I prefer to be empty and perfect, I wish I could float away. This is my guesstimate for today;
Onion Ring Crisps:
82cals
Thick homemade veg soup:
200cals
4x cookies:
200cals
2x tea with full fat milk (mum buys it):
50cals
Total:
532cals
Yesterday was awful though;
Kids chicken bite meal from burger king:
400cals
Cup of wkd:
100cals
3x coors light:
297cals
Bikers crisps:
69cals
Taco Chip:
400cals
Sweets:
50cals
Total:
1396cals
DietCokePleasexxx
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